Morbid obesity, and by “morbid” I mean “must use a truck scale to weigh yourself,” is an ever increasing epidemic in the United States. During the middle ages, obesity was seen as a sign of wealth and virility. This was because most of the people in the world were poor and starving to death. If you could afford enough food to become obese, you were looked upon as a god.
During the 1800’s, we reached the “8 inch waist” era, during which women of completely normal size would squeeze their midsections into a very small tube known as a “corsette.” (From the latin: cors – to squeeze the tummy tightly, and ette – of a girl) During this period, women would also wear a butt-enlarging item called a “bustle.” (From the latin: Bust – large female, and le – butt) This combination of tiny waist and huge buttocks was considered the ultimate in femininity.
Then came the 1900’s, which started out in a very elegant, sleek style, and progressed to the 1950’s, where women like Marylin Monroe were considered the hotsy-totsiest women around… Marylin was not exactly scrawny by supermodel standards. And that was ok, because Marylin would frequently stand over blowing sewer grates which would lift her dress around her head. People forgot she wasn’t scrawny because they were busy looking up her dress.
Then came the 1980’s and 1990’s where glamour magazines decided that what is really sexy is when a woman looks like a skeleton covered in shrink wrap. This era was discouraging for most women, because it isn’t easy to look like a shrink wrapped skeleton.
Fortunately, after the shrink wrap era came the “who gives a crap” backlash to the shrink wrap era. During the “who gives a crap” era, people were allowed to be as big as they wanted to be, because it wasn’t their fault that society chose to hold up an unattainable standard. It was total weight anarchy.
And with anarchy came justifications… oh so very scientific ones. First, we were told that morbid obesity is purely a genetic condition. This came as a surprise to most people, who had always been taught that obesity was caused by food. However, who were we, the layperson, to argue with science. Fortunately for us, all sorts of things previously racked up to “behavior” were now found to be genetic. Granted, this new announcement couldn’t actually be backed up by any observable science… but it was enough to have a scientist say it was the case.
After the genetic argument was pretty much defunct, we needed a new justification. Ah, of course… it must be the product of our environment. I’m 1100 pounds because my mother keeps bringing me ice cream in bed. I can’t leave my room, so I might as well sleep all the time. This was closer to the truth, but due to it’s closeness to actual truth… we had to move on to something else.
It’s psychological. Of course! The ultimate unprovable “science.” I’m 1100 pounds because I have deep dark issues such as I wasn’t hugged enough and my mother had an affair with the milk man. If you’re morbidly obese, all you need to do is uncover a repressed memory, and it’s all good.
Well, the general population of non-morbidly obese didn’t buy the psychological argument, because EVERYONE in the universe had bad crap happen to them. It was time to blame: Illness. I have bad knees so therefore I can’t exercise. I have a headache, and food makes me feel better. I have to prepare in case I ever have a tapeworm. Etc.
Still, illness even in it’s legitimate forms can’t possibly account for the vast number of morbidly obese popping up around the country. It must be something else.
McDonalds. Yes. It must be McDonalds. No one was obese before we had McDonalds. Simple logic dictates they must be the cause. It couldn’t have anything to do with the fact that I stuff my face nonstop 24 hours a day. It’s that damned double cheeseburger and fries I had for my afternoon snack.
Thank god it’s McDonalds and “carbs” that cause obesity and not calories.