So, I was talking to my friend Paula yesterday about the newest hurricane bearing down on Florida, and we realized… this is it!
Where do people go when they’re old and broken down? Florida.
Who is the biggest burden on the federal system? The people that are old and broken down.
What is the most messed up scheme ever devised by man, destined to fail in a matter of years? Social Security.
What state is repeatedly demolished by mother nature? Florida.
When the Earth detects an imbalance, doesn’t it always fight back and try to restore the norm? Of course it does.
The hurricanes that keep hitting Florida are obviously mother Earth fighting back to save Social Security.
There. I’ve said it. Obviously, this theory is still in it’s infancy, but I think it has some definite promise. If we can just somehow get Florida to fall off into the ocean, we will have all the Social Security reform we need.
I think I may have inadvertently stumbled across the thing that’s been foiling economists for years. Mother Earth. Yes, the old gal plays a bigger part in the economy than we give her credit for. Natural disasters are always good for the economy, but I never considered this particular form of helpfulness. (ie Killing the people that drain the economy…)
Granted, we also need to figure out how to get rid of Arizona and New Mexico, but those could be tougher. Our only hope is that Mexico invades and captures those states. Somehow I doubt they want to take on the extra burden of taking care of the old and infirmed, so we can pretty much rule out the Mexican invading force.
Did you know that your lovely congressman/woman does not have the Social Security that we know and love so much? No, they voted to get themselves off of Social Security, and devised a lucrative plan that will earn them millions on retirement. You think it would still be messed up if they had to have the same lousy benefits that we get? Heck no.
Unfortunately, it’s pretty tough to vote their plan down, since they are the ones that get to vote.