Reclaim the Rainbow

So I noticed on CNN.com this morning, they have a live “Vatican Smoke Cam.” Really. Does anyone see how incredibly moronic that is? For Incredipete’s sake… when they elect a new Pope, I’m sure it will make the evening news. Do we really have people sitting and staring all day… “man, I gotta stay at my computer. That smoke’s gonna turn white, I just know it.”

And on that subject, why is it that “white” smoke is good, and “black” smoke is bad? My sensibilities are offended by the blatant racism inherent in the Catholic church. Why can’t we have rainbow smoke, to recognize all of the diversity in the world? Oh yeah, I almost forgot that the gays hijacked the rainbow. Never mind. (I’m sure Andy has a rainbow sticker on his Celica)

I think it’s time to reclaim the rainbow. I can handle legalizing gay marriage, so long as we get to have the rainbow back. I remember a more innocent time, when the rainbow meant “My Little Pony” was coming on, thus it was time to leave the room. I had a naive friend, and she put a rainbow sticker on her car, because she likes rainbows. It didn’t turn out so great for her.

America isn’t like a rainbow. It’s more like a stew… with rotten carrots and potatoes in it, that you have to pick through carefully to find the good stuff, and regardless, you’re gonna get covered with slime, and even if you pick out all the rotten stuff, you’ll still get food poisoning from the broth.

I just want to be able to wear my pink shirt without being called a feyg. If I was a feyg, I’d wear a rainbow. Pink is not the symbol of gayness. Pink is the color of pretty flowers and other things that I like. So stop discriminating against me for my pink shirt before I whip out Title 7 on your punk tushy. It doesn’t matter that Title 7 doesn’t cover lifestyle things, like pink shirts and gayness. All I need is a liberal judge who will “interpret” the law to include my pink shirt.

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If that entry didn’t pee in your Wheaties, you need to lay off the pot.

  21 comments for “Reclaim the Rainbow

  1. GoingLoopy
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    You know, WCG has a point. If Andy REALLY isn’t gay, he’d just call it pink. We all know that straight men have no idea what salmon or ecru are.

  2. Andy
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Yes, we need to take the rainbow back. Think of the trout.
    One of my first roommates made a huge neon Pink triangle and hung it on his bedroom wall. Being the naive retard that I am, I didn’t realize he was gay or what it meant…until one day he started trying to stuff his cock in my mouth then it all made sense.

    half true. I moved out.

  3. warcrygirl
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    What Andy isn’t telling you is that he and his roommate have matching rainbow tattoos on their asses.

    I had to explain the term ‘metrosexual’ to my husband the other day; he thinks guys who wear pink shirts are okay. It’s the guys who wear pink shirts and call them “salmon” that are gay…

  4. Nightmare
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    well Incredipetey, I don’t know why there is so much haterd toward the pink shirts, I never hear anything when I wear mine, then again most people don’t like to talk to me anyway pink shirt or not.

    And white smoke denotes the all that is good and holy and black smoke is the color of brimstone and flesh melting. No racial connotations, just biblical.

  5. Andy
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    WCG, you should see when I get excited. It turns into a 100000000000000.00 bill.

  6. Andy
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    WCG, that’s not true. We do not have matching tatooes on our asses. Thanks for spreading false rumors, bimbo.

    They’re on our ankles, not our asses.

  7. Andria
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Technically, Incredipete, the pink triangle is one of the symbols for gay pride (although the rainbow has taken over the top spot for the gay marketing).

    THE WHITE SMOKE!! HALLELUJAH! Whatever.

    I don’t care what jokes they make, guys who wear pink shirts are hot. Even Andy.

  8. DanjerusKurves
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    syn_ack … I always read Incredipete and often have nothing to say, so I just leave a pee stain on the fence to mark that I’ve been here.

  9. Incredipete
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Sounds like a deal!

  10. Andy
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Oh and Incredipete, I don’t know what half assed, Mickey Mouse school you are going to, but that’s not Cyrillic. No way.

    Anybody with half a brain would recgonize that as Orkian.

    You know, “Na-Noo Na-Noo”.

  11. GoingLoopy
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Maybe the pope should have PINK smoke. And we’ll all be sure to send you rainbow stuff for your birthday.

  12. mental
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Let me know when your statistics are done, because i am actually easily able to read the cyrillic alphabet. My boyfriend is from Serbia…remember? Much studying done in the last year. 🙂

  13. syn_ack89
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    IP, yesterday’s entry wasn’t boring. I just didn’t have anything to say. Much like today. 🙂

  14. DanjerusDahling
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    I have a “pink triangle” of sorts … surely that doesn’t mean I’m gay??

  15. Incredipete
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    I appreciate all of the pee stains. Andy, I realize it’s not Cyrillic… it was when I composed it, but apparently browsers don’t actually support the danged Cyrillic characters, so it just substitutes the Orkian. The title should have read “Ukranian Statistics” in actual Ukranian. The two words in the first paragraph were “alphabet” and “crap” respectively.

  16. syn_ack89
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    hehe. and dk, i lurk on your diary as well…

  17. Anisettekiss
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Did it feel weird to say “for Incredipete’s sake”?

  18. DanjerusKurves
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Andy’s lovely wife obviously knows how to blow a hundred bucks … syn_ack, I heart my lurkers!

  19. warcrygirl
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Andy don’t be so cheeky; your wife told me about the hundred dollar bill you’ve got tattooed on your willy…

  20. syn_ack89
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    Ahem…well that is one idea. But I just wanted IP to realize that just because we don’t leave comments doesn’t mean we don’t enjoy the entry. That’s a weird sentence – but hopefully you know what I mean!

  21. DanjerusKurves
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    According to Incredipete, they always enjoy the entry! 😉

Comments are closed.