Puppies Only SEEM Like a Good Idea

Puppies are so cute.

When you see them at the pet store or shelter, they look so helpless and pathetic… they NEED someone to love them. *sniff*

But puppies know that the only way they will get adopted is to look pathetic. They do it on purpose. Otherwise, no one would take home a creature that chews on everything, poops on everything, and whines 24/7. You can’t really say the same about children, because I’d estimate that 85% of babies are just a byproduct of what the couple was doing.

When I got Abby, she was at the shelter. She was the most pathetic critter I’d ever seen. She had these big sad eyes and docile personality. I couldn’t leave her there. Then I got her home and she had bordatella, worms, and of course – she wasn’t housebroken. That particularly sucked at the time because I didn’t have a fenced yard. I had to take her out on a leash every 2 hours. For six months. It was awful.

Amber was older when I adopted her… about 8 months. I thought she was being horribly mistreated by the shelter, because every time I saw her she was laying in a puddle of pee. I adopted her and guess what… when I got her home, she continued laying in a puddle of pee. I would take her outside for an hour and she’d do nothing, then the moment I put her back in the cage, she’d pee. She was healthy, but she wasn’t housebroken for another 6 months after I adopted her.

Now we have Sheriff. He’s our pug, and he’s about 4 months old. He poops about 40 times a day. I have no idea where it all comes from. You can tell that he doesn’t really LIKE sleeping in poop, but that doesn’t stop him from doing it almost every night. He flops around in his sleep, so by morning he is like a chocolate covered cherry, only instead he’s a poop covered dog.

Sheriff also likes to chew on things… shoes, blankets, socks, feet. Today while I was cleaning his cage, he grabbed the blanket off the couch, dragged it to the middle of the room, then jumped on it and peed.

I’d almost forgotten what it was like having a puppy, but now I remember. I’m pretty sure it’s always like this.

Next time, remind me to adopt a 5 year old dog.

  3 comments for “Puppies Only SEEM Like a Good Idea

  1. February 24, 2009 at 11:12 am

    *cough* maybe it’s time to have add a human child to the household? Of COURSE you can name it after me!

  2. BJD
    February 24, 2009 at 1:03 pm

    W. C. Fields said, “no one who hates children and dogs can be all bad.”

  3. livieloo
    February 24, 2009 at 1:10 pm

    Hey Incredipete, next time get a 5 year old dog! Haha.
    I know a lot of little dogs that poop ALL the time. I house-sat a golden and a shitzu once (I have no idea how to spell that) and the shitzu pooped five times as much as the golden. Crazy.

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