Out of the Frying Pan…

As you regulars know, I’m going to be graduating a week from Friday with my MBA. It’s been a long time coming. I’ve been in college since 1996. It’s been a lot of time, money, effort, and sleepless nights. Hopefully it will end up being worth it.

So, in light of all of these last 11 years, you’d think I’d be shaking the UMKC dust off my shoes and busting out of there. You’d be wrong.

I have agreed to start teaching at UMKC in January. In addition to my real job. Because I’m crazy.

The first class I’ll be teaching is a Master’s level business course in service operations management. I took the class a couple years ago, so at least I’m semi-familiar with the material. I am not teaching for the money. If you are a teacher, you know I’m not kidding about that.

I agreed to teach because it’s a great opportunity – maybe even a once in a lifetime opportunity – to teach at the Master’s level. That’s great for the resume, and it’s great experience, and it’s great for keeping skills and knowledge up to date.

Hopefully teaching will not be the same as attending school.

And now, the top 10 ways to know you should not pursue another degree:

10. Getting a Ph.D will make you unqualified for the job you already have.

9. You’ve been claiming tuition deductions on your tax forms for so long the IRS makes you send extra proof that you’re really in school each year.

8. You sit down to watch some TV and notice this “Really awesome new show called ‘Friends'”

7. Everyone on campus think you’re on the faculty, including the real faculty.

6. You have more credit hours than most of your professors.

5. You study for all of your tests by flipping through the book and making sure you recognize all of the bold words.

4. You accidentally drive to campus on days you don’t have class.

3. When you started college, we were at war in Iraq under George Bush, but it wasn’t the current president.

2. You fall asleep with your eyes open during group presentations and you’re still able to answer questions about the topic without waking up.

1. Someone asks you to do a SWOT and PEST analysis and you snicker to yourself because you know that a brain-damaged chimp could provide more insight into a company’s problems than either of those models.

  3 comments for “Out of the Frying Pan…

  1. December 5, 2007 at 1:48 pm


    And I find your studying methods totally appropriate. That’s how I studied when I was in college. The rest was just being gifted in the art of bullshitting in an organized fashion.

  2. December 5, 2007 at 2:28 pm

    That’s basically what a business degree is… a degree in organized BS.

  3. allie
    December 7, 2007 at 1:07 pm

    well done sir.

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