Just Look Out the Window

What kind of profession allows routine incorrectness? People expect the forecast to be wrong, at least here in the midwest. If the forecast is correct within 15 degrees, it’s a success.

I’ve literally been driving through a thunderstorm, and the local weather is being broadcast on the radio “there’s a slight chance for rain today…” HELLO! If you just stuck your head out the window you could get that one right.

Three years ago we had a massive ice storm which left most of Kansas City without power for days. The power at my house was out for 9 straight days, and needless to say, it was frickin cold. The forecast didn’t say anything about a massive ice storm that was going to be so bad it caused all of the trees to break in two.

I’ve long thought that the weather was forecast using the “majority rules” method. 10 weathermen go into a room with no windows and vote. If two of them vote that it’s going to rain, the forecast calls for a 20% chance of rain.

It has to be a windowless room, because otherwise they would see that it’s ALREADY raining.

And then the extended forecast… give me a break. They can’t tell me what it’s going to be like in two hours, let alone 5 days from now.

Isn’t meteorology supposedly “science?” It seems to be more art than science, and it isn’t even good art. It’s like impressionistic neospongebob modern art.

Weathermen don’t even fight it. They are proud of their pathetic “streaks” where they predict 6 days in a row. (Meaning they got more than 50% of the forecast correct for 6 days) They pat themselves on the back for these freak statistical anomalies. I could get just as much success if I predicted the forecast using nothing but a random number generator.

You look at a situation like the hurricanes that are forever hitting the East and Gulf coasts of the US. The weather people say things like “It will make landfall in South Carolina at 6:00 on Tuesday, unless a kangaroo in the Singapore zoo sneezes on Monday, in which case it will hit Alabama at 8:00 on Monday, unless of course the warm air from Mexico mixes with the cold air from North Dakota which could cause the hurricane to veer wildly into New York. Frankly people, we don’t know where the hell it’s going to hit, nor do we know when, or what magnitude it will have, nor….”

There’s no other profession on earth where you can be wrong 80% of the time and not get fired.

I don’t have a solution for the problem. Perhaps fire all the meteorologists in the world, and just look out the window occassionally.

  7 comments for “Just Look Out the Window

  1. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Anisettekiss You can move up to Philly with me where the weather is totally accurate. I’m taking appliations right now for my next biatch. You game?

  2. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: incredime Just a reminder- Don’t go to the gas station in shorts. It’s freakin cold!!!! I was trying to pretend it was in the 60’s. Didn’t work.

  3. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete Case and point:

  4. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: jodcifer Incredipeteeee, perhaps.. just perhaps… if you have a serious problem with your neighborhood power company, you should invest in a generator. Just a thought.

  5. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete I have a humongous fire place with gas start. Unfortunately, the inside opening is only large enough for one small twig. I need gas logs.

  6. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Teets Hi guy, I have a suggestion for you. Since you live in a place that is cold and can have the power out for 9 days due to ice, you should get a fireplace. You could be toasty when the power is out, instead of being a Incredipete-cicle. If you already have a fireplace, just disregard this suggestion. 🙂

  7. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: warcrygirl Holy crap Incredipete, what kind of moronic fucktards do you have predicting the weather? Ours get it right 99% of the time, and by right I mean within 5 degrees.

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