It’s A Hard Knock Life

Hello, Incredifans! Glad to see you back again. I realize you only visit in hopes of a brawl, or because your job is hopelessly boring. Whatever your reason, you are the salt of the earth.

Last night I went to see the musical “Annie” with Jennyanydots, who of course was the star of the wonderful catfight two weeks ago. We started by visting a restaurant called the “Machine Shed” which as it turns out is called that because they use petroleum based lubricants to flavor the food. I ordered french onion soup and a pork tenderloin sandwich. The soup came out, and it was the nastiest thing I’ve ever tasted. It was like a cross between a garlic clove and a piece of raw catfish soaked in a nice broth of skunk.

I’ve never had french onion soup that I didn’t love. I order it EVERYWHERE. So, I sent it back, and Jennyanydots got the potato soup she so deeply desired. Then my sandwich came out. First of all, it looked like Tempura batter on it, which just doesn’t seem right, because it wasn’t a Chinese restaurant, but I figured… how bad can a pork tenderloin be?

It turns out it can be completely disgusting. It was so bad, I lost my will to eat as soon as I took a bite. In fact, I started thinking maybe I had a virus or something starting, because I never lose my appetite like that unless I’m sick. I managed to choke down half of the sandwich, but only because Jennyanydots pouted and told me she couldn’t enjoy herself if I was too sick to eat.

Finally we made it to the show, and as bad as this sounds, I immediately fell in love with the character “Molly” in the musical, who was the cutest little kid I’ve ever seen. (Except for “Lynne’s” kid, of course.) The girl that played Annie was a local kid, and she did a good job. She has a sweet voice, and a good stage presence, considering she’s only 12.

At the very end of the performance, as we were standing and applauding, we heard a loud THWACK, followed by shattering glass, roughly 3 feet to my left. I looked over, and the lens and carrier from the spotlight 30 feet above us had dropped right where people had been sitting minutes before. If they had not been inconsiderate and left early, they would have had a serious head injury.

When we got done with the musical, we went back to the car, and got in… it smelled like someone had barfed in the back seat. We looked back and realized it was the leftover half of my pork tenderloin. Apparently they had used some kind of “barf batter” because the smell was intense. We rolled down all the windows and headed for home.

I got home about 11:30, and of course, per usual, I couldn’t sleep, so I read my hate mail that people emailed me yesterday, and that put me right to sleep. I overslept and barely made it to work, which is bad because my departments are VERY busy right now. Oh well, nobody’s perfect. Not even IncrediIncredipete…

  29 comments for “It’s A Hard Knock Life

  1. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete Well, CBHB, Ms. Right knows now! LOL

  2. The
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: The Pimp-meister Hey Ms Right, don’t get offended at the silicone comment. The comments about your upper chest are based solely on comments from this web site. Silicone or not, boobs are boobs. Right Incredipetee???

  3. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: CBHB If I had to guess, I would say that Ms. Right is more of a slut than Jennyanydots, just based on her postings. Incredipete, does she know you and Jennyanydots have season tix to the theater? It’s going to be a long summer with that attitude.

  4. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: thea I’m on your side bro. In this chicks world, I say ‘do your thing’. Be it deer, rabbits, what have you. It’s all in the way you move babe.

  5. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Wendy Imagine that. Someone other than Incredipete or HRT talking to Thea (keep up the good work on the capitalization.)

  6. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Brian That sheds some light on my heretofore inexplicable urge to copulate with barnyard animals. Thanks for clearing that up.

  7. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Thea There’s people in here that think if you say the ‘F’ word that you sleep with your father/goat/whatever fucked you up in the head in the first place. Don’t sweat it, I’s just playin’ … too much coffee.

  8. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Brian thea… WTF?

  9. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Thea Hey Brian, I’d be careful if I’s you, cussin’ don’t go well ’round here. Before you know it, you’ll be sleeping with your 3 sisters and the neighbor’s dad, and form a mental block capable of stopping a train … just like me.

  10. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Brian Dearest Jamey: I think EFFING is a funnier in print when it is spelled phonetically.

  11. Ms.
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Ms. Right I don’t think that’s very funny, mr. pimple meister. But you’re right, I am a bit perturbed that Incredipeter went to yet another musical with that slut Jennyanydots.

  12. The
    November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: The Pimp-meister Uh oh, Incredipetee, “Silicone Girl” Ms. Right isn’t going to be happy that you went to a musical without her. Look for “Catfight” Round 2 starting today!

  13. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Brian Jamey… Please eff off.

  14. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete Once I just happened to be first on Dusty’s Site and I thought I was going to faint with excitement.

  15. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Wendy Sadly enough, it is true about the stalkers. You can identify them by their weird obsession with declaring that they were first. This is so important to them because this will be the one and only thing they will be first at in their pathetic lives.

  16. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Jamey Dearest Incredipetey: And friends: it’s “F-ing” not as in: ineffable…o.k.? Brian: you seem nice but, do we know you? Why does your life really and truly sound like hell? Are there really people who more or less stalk websites looking for one in which they can make the first entry? Incredipete: double entries don’t count you actually have fewer morons responding to your site than you would leave a reader to believe…. Love and kicks The Jamester

  17. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete I’m like a bad addiction to paint thinners. You know there has to be something better out there, but I’m strangely comforting just at the right time.

  18. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Brian Man. Shitty night out. Can’t think of anything witty to say, so I’ll say this. We live in Virginia, and a massive storm rolled through yesterday. Lost power around 1:00 PM, just got it back this morning at 8:45. For the uninitiated, it is hot as FUCK in Virginia in July. Just thought I’d whine a bit. Oh, and our water is provided by a private well. No power, no water… No water, no flush. Get it? Made for a pleasant night. I attempted to drink all of the beer in my refrigerator before it got too hot. (Failed attempt, rough day at work today). Thanks for letting me spooge on your comments section.

  19. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Jackie Sorry I put my shit out there twice I am an effing moron.

  20. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Jackie I gave your entry another try and I have to tell you….well lets just say the color scheme thing was nice,maybe you should just stick with that. What color shoes are you wearing with these outfits? I can’t believe this is what being a widow to playstation has done to me.

  21. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Jackie I gave your entry another try and I have to tell you….well lets just say the color scheme thing was nice,maybe you should just stick with that. What color shoes are you wearing with these outfits? I can’t believe this is what being a widow to playstation has done to me.

  22. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Wendy Okay Incredipete. Work with me. Understand that it is not always about you. Some freaks spend all day looking for updates (any updates) just so they can be the first one to sign. They think it makes them special when in all actuality it proves what a loser they are. “I’m First! I’m First!”………..Christ!

  23. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete Wendy, I like to reward initiative, that’s all. I figure whoever signs first has probably been spending some time checking for updates, and they deserve kudos for that.

  24. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Wendy Oh, and this is for HRT–who is the white chick? Just wonderin

  25. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Wendy Incredipete, what the hell is going on here? So far, this comments page very much resembles stupid! What is the big hairy ass deal about being first to sign. Who gives a rats ass? Let’s keep conversations with dim wits to a minimum, shall we?

  26. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Thea Gosh, … *sniff*, I’ve never had my very own ‘shout out’. *does parade wave*

  27. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: Incredipete And Thea wins the daily “Shout out” for being first to post.

  28. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: thea And you Incredipete for being ‘somewhere out there’…

  29. November 30, -0001 at 12:00 am

    AUTHOR: thea Damn man … am I first on the page ‘o’ Incredipete? WOW! I’d like to thank my subconcious for drawing me to you, … and of course my mom for breathing life into my elated lungs…

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