Is it a passive-aggressive plot?

Normally I would shy away from a hard and cold stereotype in a post, but the evidence is overwhelming, at least here in the suburbs of Kansas City, particularly on the Kansas side of the state line.

Black people insist on driving agonizingly slow in the passing lane, making sure to drive right next to the granny in the middle lane so that the only way to get around is to go all the way to the right and speed past both of them in an illegal pass. Today I was stuck behind one for about 5 miles, I finally made a death-defying right-lane pass at about 100 miles per hour, only to find myself behind another black person going 55 in the passing lane about one mile later. The speed limit is 65.

This isn’t an isolated incident or a coincidence. It happens on my commute almost every day. If a white person was ever the culprit, I’d remember it vividly because it NEVER happens. The white people are ALL trying to go 80 and being frustrated by the slow black drivers.

So here are some potential theories:

1. Black people like to drive slow because they are inherently safer drivers than white people.

2. Black people lack the skills to drive faster than 55 miles per hour.

3. Black people are afraid the police are going to mercilessly profile them and beat them Rodney King style if they speed.

4. Black people are passive-aggressively getting back at whitey for slavery by making them late for work every day.

I have to believe that it’s option 4. There are no cops to speak of on this stretch of highway… that’s why everyone goes at least 80 (everyone white, that is). I’m positive driving safety doesn’t get into the mix, because it’s NOT safer to go 25 miles per hour under the prevailing speed. It actually becomes dangerous because everyone feels compelled to tailgate 1 inch behind them in hopes they will pull over, which of course they never do.

It can’t be a skill factor. All you have to do to see that black people should be the best drivers on the road is watch the NBA or the NFL for 5 minutes. Black people are genetically superior athletes, which you would think would transfer into driving skills since much of that is hand-eye coordination.

Yes, I think it’s a massive plot by black people to get back at whitey for the years of oppression and racism. I’d say “Who can blame them?” except that –

NO LIVING AFRICAN-AMERICAN WAS EVER A FRICKIN’ SLAVE and NO LIVING WHITEY WAS EVER A SLAVE OWNER.

PS – Kanye, the reason you keep losing isn’t because you’re black, it’s because you suck. MTV gives tons of awards to black people, you moron.

  10 comments for “Is it a passive-aggressive plot?

  1. livieloo
    September 10, 2007 at 10:02 am

    I completely agree with you on this one. I’d say it goes for walking down hallways as well …

  2. September 10, 2007 at 10:06 am

    Oh dude, you’re going to get hate mail now! I get the same thing here as far as clogging the aisles in Walmart however it’s equal black/white/old person so I don’t think it’s racial. Next time just blow your horn at them!

  3. September 10, 2007 at 11:04 am

    Incredipete, come to California when you can see racial stereotypes about driving really live up to the the hype. Seriously, no one can drive out here (especially the Asians and Mexicans and ANYONE on a cell phone).

  4. September 10, 2007 at 11:24 am

    I think that the black people around here know that the Overland Park police are notorious for pulling over black people for no reason… if I were black, I’d be afraid to even drive through the area.

  5. September 10, 2007 at 11:38 am

    It’s no different here in Houston, Texass … I tend to think that they (well, the younger ones anyway) believe they look cooler when cruising slowly with their seats halfway reclined and their caps on backward … and of course, the obligatory cellphone.

  6. September 10, 2007 at 11:43 am

    Speaking of racism, did you see that Kanye West threw another tantrum about not winning at the VMA’s last night? He pulled the race card. It seems like his MO is to be a big fat loser and then claim it’s cuz he’s black. Because no black people ever win anything at the VMA’s. Retard.

  7. September 10, 2007 at 12:01 pm

    Actually, here, the black people all seem to drive in a perfectly normal fashion. It’s the white trash that drives 40 miles an hour down the freeway. That, and soccer moms/lawyer types in luxury vehicles talking on their cell phones.

    Plus, in downtown OKC, we get a lot of tourists, who, in addition to not knowing how to read speed limit signs, don’t know what stoplights, crosswalks, no parking zones, or one-way streets are.

  8. September 10, 2007 at 8:38 pm

    There does seem to be a prevailing philosophy across any down-trodden ethnic group, doesn’t matter if its bullshit or not “It’s all YOUR fault because you’re white dammit!”

    Although here, the shitty drivers are all Asians, but that may because the Aboriginals don’t have cars.

    I’ma go shave my head now, strap on some motorcycle boots, and preach about the purity of my race…

    Seriously, good onya though Pedro. Is it me, or is this kind of thing not said because it’s not PC? It’s a different kind of worse over here, because a drunken white trash gal screaming and threatening her 3 year old in McD’s is going to get straightened out quickfast, but an Indigenous gal won’t hear a fkn whisper even if she lays a slappin and calls her a “stupid c*nt”.

    None of it’s right, but it’s just as much the fault of those who are afraid to say something as anyone’s.

    Smooches.

  9. RDC
    September 11, 2007 at 3:49 am

    We do encounter a lot of the darker complected crossing the road ever. so. slowly. as they occularly challenge you to say something.

    OH! I SEE. I’M WHITE AND YOU’RE NOT. MY BAD. CARRY ON.

  10. September 12, 2007 at 7:02 am

    What I don’t understand is how I can see your web page again, just a day or so after I told you my new work fire wall had it blocked.

    That is weird.

    Oh and Kayne is a nincompoop, and I think it has little to do with color, race, religion, or gender, when it comes to bad driving. It all boils down to STUPIDITY! the Stupid people will fuck up a commute faster then Al Sharpton playing a race card.

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