It’s time for some tough love. Keep in mind I’m out of town (so you can’t hurt me).
I am so sick and tired of hearing people make excuses for the stupid and/or bad things they do by their own choice. Yes, I do stupid and bad things, but I’d like to think I don’t make excuses. It’s maddening.
“Smoking helps keep me level.”
“I overeat because it comforts me.”
“Drinking helps me be more social.”
“I’m just sowing the wild oats till I meet the right person.”
“I’m just not wired for school.”
Those are just a few examples of making excuses. These are the same people who will complain about their chronic cough, complain about being fat, complain about always being hung over, complain about never having a serious relationship (or about having Herpes), and complain about being in a dead end job.
Of course you’re suffering the consequences of your actions. That’s how the universe works. Making excuses is a weak-minded way of dealing with your addictions, however.
If you want to stop smoking, stop smoking. Yeah, it’s easier said than done, but a crapload of people have quit successfully, so it must be possible. What’s the difference between the successful quitters and you? Well, they stopped making excuses and took action.
If you want to be thin, it’s pretty simple. Eat less. There’s no mystery to it. 1 pound is equal to about 3,500 calories. If you eat 3,000 calories a day and you only need 2,000, you’re going to gain about 40 pounds a year. It’s simple math. The inverse is true. If you eat less, you will lose weight by the same formula. No gimmicks, no shortcuts, just a decision to control yourself.
If you want to overcome your shyness, don’t do it with a crutch like alcohol. That’s not really “overcoming” anything. It’s simply masking your true normal behavior. Alcohol can be very damaging when used for the wrong reasons. In fact, come to think of it I can’t really think of any good reasons to drink. Maybe that’s why I don’t drink anymore!
Being promiscuous is another one that is often overlooked. It can be very damaging. Most of the people I know who were/are promiscuous have a very flippant, skewed perspective on sex. It’s not really even special to them anymore. And they wonder why no one wants to settle down with them. Hmmm. Then of course there’s the STD issue, which is yet another reason to stop making excuses!
“Not being wired for school” is one of my all time favorite excuses. Translation: School takes way too much time and it’s way too hard for me to commit. Ok, that’s fine if you mean it. But when you’re 40 years old making 12 bucks an hour, you’d better remember that it was your choice.
There will always be excuses for things we don’t want to do, including thing we SHOULD do. However, the grown up thing to do is to stop with the excuses and bite the bullet.