Don’t Ask, Don’t Care

I’ve never met a gay guy who wasn’t musclebound and hulking. I think this is because they are trying to attract other men, and men are notoriously superficial. We heteros have it much easier because women are not as superficial (thank god). An ugly, flabby guy has a decent shot at love with a woman if he has other things going for him, where a gay guy who is ugly and flabby is probably going to be lonely.

Of course those are generalities, but this is my blog and I’ll stereotype if I feel like it.

So given the assumption that most gay men are hunks of beef, doesn’t that make them ready-made for the military? Think about it… hundreds of thousands of hunky men all sleeping, showering, and working out together. If one didn’t know better, one would assume that the ENTIRE military is gay.

Hetero guys join the military because chicks dig a man in uniform, and it’s cool to carry a gun. Gay guys may very well join the military to meet men. I’d say that both are legitimate goals. The hetero guys get to have their reward when they’re on leave, and the gay guys get to have theirs while they’re deployed.

I’ve always thought the don’t ask, don’t tell policy was ridiculous, because frankly, there’s a strong homo-erotic overtone to the entire military. Unlike guys in the military, I’ve never shared a room with a bunch of guys, I’ve never showered with a bunch of guys… that doesn’t happen in the real world.

Some of you will now tell me that womyn make up a growing percentage of the armed forces. And that’s true. And I’m fine with womyn joining the military to find other butch womyn. That’s just as fair as men joining to meet men.

But Incredipete, you’re implying that most of the military is gay or lesbian!

Yup.

So why do you have a problem with that? Are you biased against gays?